Choose your weapon!

If you could create a character that could wield any weapon you can imagine, what would you pick? Big shiny Final Fantasy-type implausible sword? Badass polearm? Duelling rapier or pistols? Chainsaw? Sex toy? Rolling pin? Crossbow? Lightsaber? Cruise Missile? BFG? Assault rifle?

I’m curious as to whether anyone would pick a staff or wand, or if they just exist (in fantasy games) to give casters something to hold … like the equivalent of a handbag, or fiddling with your glasses when you can’t think of anything to say.

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29 thoughts on “Choose your weapon!

  1. Oh, I’d totally go for a staff. Multi-use device – apart from bludgeoning people with it, it can be used to poke or knock down things you can’t reach, you can lean on it as a walking stick, use it to balance crossing difficult terrain, as part of a makeshift tent, and so on.

    I’ve a decent staff at home, actually; it doesn’t see a lot of use, but sometimes it’s been the ideal tool.

    That said, I also own a claymore sword, but it’s an awkward, heavy piece of kit.

  2. Katana. No question. Mostly because I find them incredibly aesthetically pleasing, and I like the Japanese marriage of form and function.

    Speaking of staves, though, I did make my own wizard’s staff (no knob on the end) for our Ars Magica freeforms in the 90s, out of an old fence-post I brought home from my grandad’s. It took me ages to sand it down and stain it and decorate it, but it was *great* once it was done. More a dignity prop than a weapon, though I never actually tried braining anyone with it. ;)

  3. Chronicles of Spellborn lets you wield swords, daggers, broadswords, whatever you want, even if you’re a caster. Wizard101, where everyone is a wizard, lets you carry swords, daggers, harps, pots of gold…. EQ2 lets you wield a stupidly huge selection of non-staff, non-wand things. DOMO is pretty forgiving for caster items. EverQuest often gave casters mugs, books, pens and other random things instead of wands and staves. Most casters wielded daggers, actually.

    Aren’t we all glad World of Warcraft’s arbitrary limitations aren’t shared by other MMOs?

    • I keep forgetting TCoS — were there differences in how useful one was with these weapons? Were they cosmetic? All I really remember is char creation and the ship-tutorial :|

    • Actually WoW lets casters wield daggers, swords or maces (depending on what type of casters) instead of staves if they want, and I’ve seen stuff like orbs or books as offhand items. BUT they don’t actually hit stuff with them.

      It’s just a common archetype in lots of fantasy settings that casters use staffs.

      I did really like that Spellborn let you choose though.

  4. WoW had plenty of cool staves and polearms, but none of them are actually used. Both casters and hunters keep their weapons strapped to their back as accessories. I liked the Diablo 2 animations, where the staff was actually used in casting. For melee staves, there’s Kilik and Seung Mina in the Soul Calibur series, Gandalf in LotR and Ray Parker as Darth Maul/Toad in Phantom Menace and X-Men.

    For modern weapons, there’s always the 50-cal sniper rifle: the scapel of guns, capable of killing just the guy you want whenever you want and whereever you want. Known users are Yoko from Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann and Seras Victoria from Hellsing.

  5. Shield and Spear…. Get a couple hundred of your best friends with them, work together, conquer half the known world.

    (i.e. the reason why tanks cry that there is no collision physics in WoW).

  6. I normally play a priest in WoW and I actually would prefer a staff (particularly if it got involved in the casting animations – what a grand idea!) – but for some reason I never see any good staffs drop until after I already have dagger/mace + offhand combo that is much better. :-(

    Like Drew mentioned staves are just such a great tool for many things, lovely things.

  7. Its a toolbox innit?

    Hand to hand:-
    Zweihander or Bardiche for general work assuming I’m amoured (I’d rather fight 10 times in harness than once without to quote Master R). From Mssr Noyes Heron armouries or Paul McDonald’s forge pelase.

    Warhamer and/or single handed sword for close work
    A good knife for stealth. Lancaster armouries for the hammer (I have one here my wife got me, they even fixed it after I broke it on an actors head). Heron or mcDonald for the sword again.

    .45 4″ Wilson Combat Hi-Cap for stuff that goes bang :) with a 870 Remmy for bigger bang (I’ll retro fit my own grips cheers very much.)

    Oh and a phased plasma rifle in a forty watt….oh yeah.

    So wands…not so much…..oh weapon customisation how we loves you. Something most MMO’s ignore as well have ‘Hoofing great weapon x thats BiS’ and every class looks the same give or take.

  8. I would dual-wield angry badgers tied to sticks. But only if my strength score didn’t allow me to use bears. And if the badgers are too heavy, I suppose there’s always the ratflail.

  9. Bo staff for close quarters, Lee Enfield No. 5 MKII if we’re talking firearms. Anything more powerful is generally overkill, and the Enfield is a oneshot up to around 700 yards.

  10. A Bat’leth of course.

    Actually, two big two-handed staffs would be cool, too.

    But for a caster, at least for a caster using some king of dark or evil magic, a dagger is, IMHO, the most appropriate weapon. A small, short, blunt, drak-glowing dagger.

    Something like

    but way way smaller.

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