I think it’s the understandable confusion around how to relate to people that can catch you out. Sure, if you are a hardcore player and join a hardcore group then the ground rules are well known. But if you are part of a group that is becoming more hardcore then some people change more (Or faster) than others, hence confusion and possibly upset. If my friends who casually raided with me went off to join a hardcore guild and never talked to me again, it’s not that surprising that I might be annoyed with them (esp if we had known each other outside the game previously )

The other reason for confusion is that a new player to MMOs may never have come into direct contact with the casual/ hardcore divide, and it might not be obvious that hardcore players are never your friends, especially if they are acting like friends.

Hardcore players are never your “friends”; they’re your peers to get things done with. You’re a tool to them, a means to an end. And that is what they were for you as well. Were; not anymore.

That doesn’t mean you can’t have a friendly or good time with hardcore players, just like casuals can still get things done while having fun and playing irregularly. However the hardcore player’s relationship is more business-like.

Therefore, it doesn’t surprise me you lost contact with your hardcore player peer group. Also, remember a hardcore can easily go casual but the other way around takes much longer. So aside from nostalgia it is hard to relate to them. There’s also a lot between hardcore and casual, and it only describes frequency of play not e.g. quality of play, type of play, role, class, …

I think it tells me that the task of finding a guild that is socially compatible, has a compatible schedule, and plays at the progression/ skill level you want is so incredibly hard that most players have no real choice other than compromising at least one of those requirements.

But what that means is that I really have no option of raiding heroic DS once per week even if I go back without going through the entire hassle of finding a new guild/ raid, gearing up, getting more cutting edge/ hardcore etc; my friends (who I imagine would be happy to have me back) simply weren’t raiding at that level (ie. progression was my compromise).

I suppose it’s just that having read Belghast’s latest post, and my own “defection” (it honestly felt that way) back to WoW, I run with the impression that Blizzard made a mess of Cataclysm in many ways, but the players made a similar mess of their expectations. For example, I raid heroic Dragon Soul once a week and the remainder of my time is my own – I’ve actually found a bigger desire to log on during the Grumpy Elf’s “dog days of Cataclysm” than I have since completing normal tier 11.

I’ve got well over 12k achievement points, yet still feel like I have plenty to do when I log on. Considering I felt absolutely bored with nothing to do when I quit the game, that’s a significant change in attitude.

That’s extraordinarily hard. :S

The guild I’m in now has, if I’m honest, treated me very poorly since joining up; this culminated in my final trial review last night which concluded in a really insulting fashion. Yet, I’m sticking it out because there are guys in the guild who I know are exceptional players and who I happen to like an awful lot. This probably tells you that I’m willing to sacrifice fair treatment for the opportunity to play with folks who help me enjoy this game. This is a personal development borne out of playing in server-leading progression guilds that, ultimately, sucked the fun out of the game.

Your recent comments about LFR really hit home here, though. In a world where the real-life burden of playing raid content can easily get in the way, Blizzard have provided an alternate means of playing endgame without having to stick to strict schedules or pushy raid leaders. This is a dramatic change in how this content is consumed, and works wonderfully if you can put up with the poisonous individuals in the queue.

What I’d like to see is an approach to endgame raiding that is flexible, yet consistent. Members don’t feel like they have to be on, and don’t feel that their absence will see a raid cancelled due to shortages. Unfortunately, the only means I’ve found of doing that in WoW end up bedevilled by the very guild members the plan is designed to welcome.

I’m not sure Blizzard has the desire to come up with a solution to this, even if they did have a Lead Systems Design team that was capable of it (they don’t).

I will think about this some more and see if I can make more of a series of these posts.

There is something about the raid/achievement/ progression mindset that makes people look at guildies in terms of game mechanics. And makes them very intolerant if someone is going through a bad patch iRL and either unable to make raids or not really able to focus as well. But also, hardcore raiding is a constant recruiting grind. Maybe some of the top guilds can keep a more stable roster but for everyone else, it’s a fight to stay sustainable that only officers really see. The raid endgame was NEVER going to be sustainable, just a lot of players never realised it.

The really painful thing, in some ways, was seeing the friendly casual guild morph into something more hardcore simply because they wanted to do some fun raiding with guildies and decided to adapt to how the game intended this to happen so as to get better progression. I’m no longer sure how well I’ll fit in even if I do go back for MoP.

Also I’m staying with a friend this week so not a lot of time for blogging. (ie. basically I agree with you though, this isn’t ideal.)